Glamorous

We see it all the time. College graduates going off and... not using their degrees as expected. I used to think this was so stupid. Why would you waste time and money if you're not going to go into the field you study? I was for sure this would never happen to me!
Well, I graduated with a Bachelor of Science in Ministry and my major was Worship Arts. Today I am a domestic engineer (aka stay-at-home-mom). I change dirty diapers, feed the baby, play with the baby, become frustrated with the baby... I clean, cook, manage our finances, plan meals, shop, and run errands with a sometimes not so patient baby... I do give a guitar lesson to a friend, and I do play every other week or so on our worship team. But I have no income, no title, no designated office to work out of.

I began thinking about all of this and how un-glamorous it can be. I'm a mom and wife. It's really just NOT glamorous. It can be beautiful, it can be ugly, and I love it as much as I get frustrated with it, but it's not something you're going to be reading about in my college alumni spotlights.

I know lots of other friends in similar situations. They've graduated college, and are seemingly living this mundane, un-glamorous life. They are working in a field that has nothing to do with their degree, they maybe have yet to find a place to settle down, they might feel stuck and like there's nothing exciting to share about their life.

But you know what? That glamour we seek doesn't really exist. Even when you DO find yourself doing what you always expected you would be doing, even if you are in the field you always dreamed you would be in, or married to the greatest person you know... the glamour always fades. The excitement, the thrill, gets slapped in the face with the reality of hardships, struggles and (shocker) hard work!

I thought there would be glamour in marriage, well it's beautiful I am so happy to be married to this fantastic man... but it sure isn't always glamourous.
I thought there would be glamour in working at Starbucks! (Barista is such a cool title!) But... that glamour also died pretty quick and was way less exciting than I thought it would be.

I thought there would be glamour in being a mom (HA!) I am sooooo not glamourous on a regular basis, and baby boy isn't exactly the perfect angel I was expecting I would have.
I thougt there would be glamour in being a STAY-AT-HOME mom... All the free time I want? Pshh... lets say I have free time to get all the chores done, dinner done, and baby alive. (Throw in an hour of 'me' time if I choose not to nap)

But three things: 1) even if I were a fantastic worship leader, or leading some crazy awesome ministry with victims of human trafficking… the glamour would fade because it should never be about us. 2) My life, in every little mundane thing that I do, only finds glamour and purpose when I turn the spotlight onto God. 3) I LOVE my life not because it feels glamourous but because it is life. It's real, raw, life where I'm learning and growing and changing as a mother, wife, friend and most of all as a servant (even that is not TRULY glamourous). As a servant, if I find myself feeling glamourous, then my focus was never truly servant-hearted.

So back to the whole 'not using your degree' thing: I know that all the experience, knowledge, community and growth I experienced while pursuing my degree has prepared me in more ways than I can explain for my journey. Ministry and Worship is not simply part of a job title, but they permeate my life as a mother, wife, friend and servant. 

I hope this can be somewhat encouraging to others. If you feel like a failure, or like you didn't live up to the expectations, or that the exciting job you sought eventually began to feel like normal life… embrace life. Find God at work in the tiny, mundane things you do every day and LIVE loving others full-heartedly. Nothing is more glamourous than pouring out yourself to love others.